SUBMISSION IS THE DEEPEST EXPRESSION OF AUTONOMY

When a trusted person of authority has lost our respect, it can make us feel like we need to take control of everything in the relationship in order to protect ourselves. This can make us skeptical to obey out of fear that submission means surrendering our autonomy. And while the refusal to submit might exercise some freedom, choosing to submit is also an exercise of freedom.

Submission is not about you losing control. It’s about losing the need for control.
Submission is not about you losing yourself. It’s about choosing where to place yourself.
Submission is not about you giving up your power. It’s about entrusting someone else to direct your power.

Most of the time, people who tell you to do something have the highest and best intent for you. You will not always be able to control what they demand, but you can control your relationship to the demand. When you lean into submitting to the people who you deeply trust, you learn that the deepest expression of autonomy is not having no one to answer to. It is choosing who you answer to.